How did you start your fetish; what are your memories?

[Rusk is my hero]

This is something I wrote earlier in response to another post. However that post was at the end of its life so there wasn’t much comeback on mine. I would like to know how others got started on their road, what they remember and what scenarios they like best.

I was brought up in the ‘50s on a British working class street, with many cinemas nearby. With an unmarried aunt, I would go twice a week. Bless her; she sat through westerns, adventure and sword and sandal films. However occasionally there were thrillers where a woman was killed. This made me uncomfortable; at the time I thought it was because women shouldn’t be killed - they were mothers, housewives etc. I wonder if it was because I enjoyed that part of the film but felt guilty about it.

My friends and I would visit second hand bookshops to buy comics. There were also True Detective magazines for sale, some imported from the States. At a time when there weren’t many scantily dressed women in film or TV, the sight of lingerie clad women in peril excited me, especially if the threat they faced was strangling. I didn’t buy any, there was something “wrong” with these magazines.

The media became more liberal, if that is the word. Newspapers like The Sun had topless models on page 3, and if those girls had something decorative around their neck – a ribbon, a scarf – then my cup did run over. The first sight of a tongue protruding from a strangled woman came in ‘68 in the BBC series about a pathologist – The Expert. Things could also creep up on you – Rhonda Fleming nearly strangled in the Bob Hope comedy The Great Lover. At school I bought a second hand war book (Comrades of War, Sven Hassell) expecting the usual stuff. But the protagonists spend the first half of the book in hospital in Hamburg, where someone is raping women and strangling them with their own stockings. I realised I was totally into this fetish and that I was a bad person. Nobody must ever know!

Then Frenzy; Hitchcock shared my fetish. What a bonus when video came along – your own private copy. In stores, browsing could find Don’t answer the phone, Halloween (P J Soles), Swinging Barmaids (Katie Saylor). The internet; Necrobabes, which I joined, heart pounding. This was wrong, I was a bad man. But there must be many bad men, or there wouldn’t be sites like this. Were we bad? We didn’t hurt anybody. To confess, I think I was disappointed with many stories posted in Necrobabes. I don’t know why; I felt ungrateful considering that a few years before I would have been over the moon to discover something like that.

And so here I am today, still a fetishist, still slightly guilty. My favourite scenario is the office scene from Frenzy. I could watch that with variations over and over again. One variation would be the woman wearing stockings instead of pantyhose, and after the failed rape, the killer would peel one off and use it instead of his tie. How about a Frenzy mini-series – we see 4 victims but know there are others. Show how they met their end, who they were etc.

Other suggestions (mostly derivative):

• The gangster’s girl-friend who knows too much and has to be silenced. He sends his hitman whom the woman knows and thinks is a friend. They have a few drinks before he kills her. My fevered imagination came up with the embellishment that she was a former actress, whose most important role was being strangled in a film. The hitman gets her drunk and speaks about her career. He asks her to dress up and act out the scene where she is murdered. She laughs and does so and he strangles her – just like her film.
• The stewardess (in a nice, sexy uniform) who has been running drugs. She meets the boss to deliver her latest cargo but he is closing down the operation and silencing all his operatives.
• The girl who doesn’t realise that the blue movie / photo shoot is going to turn into a snuff one. (Sidney Sheldon’s Bloodline used this but could have been better.)
• Hookers in all sorts of ways….

[misspandora]

It's interesting-I've been doing erotic horror for a while now, and I've met so many fans and customs clients who cite the movie "Frenzy" as an inspiration for them.

It really is a great movie, and that strangulation scene is chilling.

I just find it interesting that a lot of the 'tongue out" strangulation preference comes from that 1 source.

[smudger]

No such events influenced me. I have had it since a long way before puberty, so have no idea how it came about.

[Nightposter]

I have been attracted to a good looking woman in uniform for as long as I can remember..
Navy WAVES, Army, Air Force, Cops, etc.
When I got older, ( in my 20's) I met a girl ( I call "Kim") who told me of her two fantasies, being a Damsel in Distress, and being in uniform. She and I explored role playing, and then she began to include some of her friends with DiD in our role plays. For an added bonus for me, she asked her friends to dress in uniforms for the role play scenes.

Kim liked to use "rough" scenes as her stress relief from the Public Safety job.
So, some nights I'd grab her when she came in the door , wrestle her to the floor, and strangle or beat her to submission ( role play, of course). Bind her tightly, and threaten her with further perils "when I get back". I'd leave the room ( go sit on the sofa) and watch her struggle and try to escape. When she was almost free, I'd "return" declare "No witnesses", and plot her demise.
of course, sex always figured into that scene... both during...and later, after.

[Indrid Cold]

While it has evolved and been refined overtime, I, literally, have had the female death fetish since as far back as I can remember, which dates back to when I was about 3. I have no idea if a particular moment fostered my fetish, but I believe the cartoons I watched - with beautiful heroines often placed in mortal peril - are largely responsible. Some of my earliest memories are of being aroused by moments when I thought Teela from "Masters of the Universe" or Scarlet from "G.I. Joe" were killed. (Of course, it always turned out that they were merely knocked unconscious.)

[bullseye]

I'm with Smudger. I didn't see my fetish in a movie or on TV (they never showed it, the cowards!), and I'm amazed to see how many people seem to have been led astray by watching violent entertainment. No wonder the righteous want to ban it! My obsession with bullseyes came out of my own tiny mind with no external example in sight, and when I was so young that I have no recollection of ever being without it. I can only guess that even in infancy there was an atavistic impulse to penetrate, and the convex target seemed the most female thing imaginable when I wasn't aware of the concave alternative. Must be something like that--I'm not much of a believer in "born this way."

[Indrid Cold]

I'm amazed to see how many people seem to have been led astray by watching violent entertainment. No wonder the righteous want to ban it!

The "righteous" want to ban it because they have an assbackwards sense of reality. Our enjoyment of violence is pure fantasy, while the "righteous" have very serious ideas of committing violence against those whom they deem unrighteous.

[Steph]

I've posted before that my first relevant memory goes back to when I was three. It is one of the few things I remember from that age and was a BBC spy adventure in four or six episodes where the heroine is apparently shot and killed in the first episode then returns at the end with gun and in an evening dress to beat the enemy. I'm sure that isn't why I have a thing about dressing up though
My first direct link was about seven when I dressed up as a saloon gal to shoot Miss Kitty and was blown away by Marshall Dillon. I think it was based on an episode of 'Gunsmoke' but can't remember any details.

My favourite two scenarios are the deceitful murderess sliding down the hunk I just tried to kill (a la Stacey Keach version of Mike Hammer 'I the jury'), and the evil company owner getting it from a ruined employee (as in the Silk Stalkings episode). I'm a (relatively!) rich aristocrat and former diplomat so I have a pretty good dressing up box! I love role playing by dressing up and then meeting the fate I deserve for my arrogance - for some reason preferably getting a bullet in the left breast first and then whatever eldse is necessary. I've fortunately trained my husband to take me out in this way, hopefully with him ravishing my body as well. He isn't into the fetish but he definitely enjoys he fringe benefits!

This thread is interesting. I've never come across so many tracing their start to a very young age before.

[Lunfardo]

In 1982 I was the small child. I very much liked to play Clyde and Bonnie on a beach. I had toy pistols, I had girlfriend Tania, she also had toy guns. We hid in bushes ashore and tried to shoot as much as possible other boys and girls before they will shoot us. When we got to us embraced each other and died together. I was 7 years old in 1982.

Still I and Tania liked to play dolls. We took some dolls, built the gallows of sticks, undressed dolls to panties and hung up. The doll of the brunette had a pink bikiny and short skirt, at a doll of the blonde - black, and long skirt, it could be changed, interchanging the position.

[Deviated]

I watched a lot of horror flicks and B-movies were sex and violence were mixed together pretty thoroughly, so I was pretty well primed for it... I got a thrill at seeing girls being fed to pit monsters by Jabba the Hut, girls being stalked by werewolves and masked men in slasher flicks, and loved the girls-with-guns battling it out on trashy late night B-movies. It didn't REALLY become a solid thing though until my teen years, when I began dating another horror movie fan who had the whole death fetish thing herself... Once you have a beautiful woman climbing into your lap every time she see's a strangling, it's only a matter of time before your body get's trained. Still, I understood it right away - just took awhile for it to become much of a player in my fantasy life.

-D

[quacker]

I believe my fetish arose as a result seeing old crime movies and crime comics as a kid. My thing is the sexy bad girl getting it sexily by shooting primarily, but sometimes by stabbing. I like the well coiffed high maintenance look with sexy attire, like Graphic Designer's babes. I haven't been a buyer of much material from our producers because the models often look to young. And although they may be pretty most of them don't look glamorous. I also hate contemporary stringy, shredded looking hair styles, piercings and tattoos.

Hard to please as ever,

quacker

[shootingmad]

I can relate my fetish to a starting point. Whenever I look back, I find myself always attached to gun play. With cousins, on my own.. I was always interested in war games. I have memories of that from all ages... 10, 6, 5... so I guess I was born with it, lol.


then of course, it got developed and mutated to machineguns as movies struck me.

[cmpunkfan16]

Not sure eaxctly how it started,but my parents were big pro wrestling fans. We watched every show and even went to some live ones as a kid. There was always at least one womens wrestling match,and usually the girl playing the "bad" one (or heel) would choke the good girl behind the refferees back. Just something about the women being choked was hot and I like many others,got hooked at a young age. I also felt dirty/guilty about liking this sort of thing but thought like many others,there wouldnt be websites for this if I was the only one interested. Hell,even my username is taken from wrestling

[Doomfreak]

There have been cases of the reality I could cope with difficult like:
Rampage at school and mostly joung women have died.
And I have seen the photos of this victims. Mostly very beautyful and must die only 16 or 17 years old.
Young women between 15 an 25 years are particularly vulnerable. Constantly victimims of accidents, rape, attacks, kidnappings, human trafficking, maltreatment and war.
I hate reality. I honestly wish, 50 percent the male world population would die spontaneously.
I´m shure, an equal world or dominated by women would be much more peaceful.

7 or 8 years before I must a solution, a separate form of confrontation with death of woman.
And that was the contemplation of the women after the death.
Very fast I have detected sides like ogrish. So i could seen many many fotos of dead females, stragulated, hanged or shooted.
It was like a calming how beautiful many of the women even after death are.
For me, this women will be forever young and beautiful and never decay.

After ogrish i have detected the old illpollaio forum were i have seen snuffart in drawings, poser, photomanipulation or screen shots from ewp, necrobabes, in shadow,...
Very interested i hve begun with my own photomanips in many forms:
hangings, decapitations, shootings, stranglings, a bit vore, stabbings...