I took a couple of days off from posting but I am going to post a reply here. Without saying anything negative(unlike previous posts on this subject) I agree with Nyghtfall. If you have a problem with DS, or it's Dictatorship, don't post there. I have been friends with the owner for a while, and like most friends we have had our ups and downs. I genuinely feel he is a decent human being, he sometimes lacks tact in public, severity depending on where he is posting. You just have to pick your battles, because there really isn't middle ground when it comes to "his" fetish, which is defined by what he sees fit as fetish. You already know I am one of those community members that feels like you can not label "my" fetish as pure, or not. What is pure to one man/woman, is not to another. I think he also feels this is a man's fetish, which I disagree with but that is his opinion, and on his board he can say and do what he likes. I still think the key is trying to not let opinions of others get you down, or control how you enjoy your fetish.
As far as producers and advertising, I am with Blue. Posting on various boards doesn't always increase your sales. I have noticed over the years the main hub of advertising is private, and bulk emailing provided by the service a bunch of us use to sell our wares. I feel like the boards might boost your sales by 5% tops, which is great, but not at the expense of spending your whole rest of your life arguing about what is right and wrong, good or bad, etc. The conclusion on the various message boards will be different, and with DS a disagreement could lead to a "vacation" or a "ban" (even ban for life) which is decided by one person who is emotionally attached to their own proprietary place that they have worked to build and make their house. Even if you have tons of people over to your house you still have to run it as yours, and have to clean up every once in a while. The other boards don't really have this type of open door/closed door policy and the negative stigma that is, "the exit door is always open". I mean if that is the mission statement of a business or entity, then it should be taken as that from the beginning.
There are so many wonderful, imaginative, and caring people in this community, it has always surprised me that one or two people out of a couple to a few thousand members of a village or community can have this type of effect on the village as a whole. I mean DS can be a fun and interesting place if you remember the unsung rules of engagement. They can and will change to suit what the owner wants with a blanket claim that "our members come to DS to escape all the pornography, and because it has the most traffic.

but I think a select few keep going back to that place because they love drama, and enjoy what it brings them. I have known many people in fantasy and RL who tent to trend this way.
I very recently had an altercation with the same person, and though my "in the now" Chris wanted to run away and hide, and cut the person off from being able to contact me for a while, I thought about the big picture, the good times, the laughs, and long strolls on the beach(oh wait, no wrong person).
Is this a perfect world that is free from one person's opinion, or actions, affecting a good portion of an entire community's opinions or actions? No, it's never been that world, it is what we make it , and if you let someone outside of your own RL bubble control your emotions in a fantasy world(I have been so guilty of this and live up to that stigma often with my emotional outbursts)then you either like it, or don't know how to control your own emotions in public. Like I said I have been so guilty of this and have falling outs with all kinds of people in the community for one reason or another, but I do not hate them, even if I say I do. I can't hate, it is not in my nature, or metaphysical make-up. Same with Greed and envy. I do not use those against anyone, nor will I ever. We all have our psychological issues, I mean we are humans and that is not an opinion, just a fact. Everything in Fantasy is up to the interpretation of the person who has their own particular fantasy. I will still and always will protect that right for each and every community member, that is not for me to judge. The boards are almost like Churches in a way, if the Fantasy is "Religion", we all have our different denominations that make us who we are and what we identify with in our own fantasy. There is a freedom that comes with that, and no one can tell you what is right or wrong in your fantasy, even if they own the forum, or website you state your opinion.
The list of reasons I started Fetnoir (With Grace X, Kelli, and Othello, and of course Mick writing the code)and continue to support it fully are these, and quite simple actually:
1.) No RL misogyny
2.) No hatred
3.) No discrimination(within the law)of a member's fetish, because it is theirs and no one can take it away from them.
4.) No discrimination due to Sexual preference, orientation, religion, color, creed, or political affiliation
5.) No Dictator(We do have a queen though in Grace X who is by far the kindest and most diplomatic person I know in RL, or fantasy)but she does not Rule with an iron fist, she moderates the participation of members on the board, huge difference.
I also wanted to make a safe haven for female members of the community who were constantly told it is a "Man's Fetish", and they need to be submissive(as a woman should).

This type of ancient and testosterone driven thinking is just archaic, and if you truly believe this you might want to look around you at all the folks that provide you with muse to enjoy your fantasies, or who you Role Play with, or maybe who birthed, raised, and wiped your butt your whole life. How can you try to keep someone under your thumb when they will be last ones you call for on your day of judgement.?
Like my long lost cousin James Brown said:
"This is a man's world
This is a man's world
But it would be nothing, nothing
Without a woman or a girl"
There is not a more true to life statement than this, and we should all embrace this when we take others and their fetish into consideration. This is just my opinion though..
Indrid Cold, I hope you can find some sort of balance. It has taken me a few years(and a mild heart attack) to get to where I need to be with my emotions in a fantasy world. I should spend all that energy creating things instead of trying to break them down. I am sorry you are having your posts deleted on Fetnoir, I did found, and help create this great private place to not be harassed, but I do not moderate or make the decisions for any of it. For the same reason I explained . If I made all the rules and decisions, it would just be another "One person's idea of what a death fetish fantasy board" should be. I know Julia X means well by what she is doing, and it might just be a miscommunication. I always ask all of the moderators about what to do, and the final decision is Grace X, like I said she is the only person I know who has using love and kindness as a keystone for all of her dealings and conversations and no one on the planet more loyal to each person and keeping their private conversations just that. I know so many of the things I wished I had not said over the years have been used against me on the board you are talking about where you were banned, but I still have to be honest and give my own opinion on the matter. I wish you good luck and hopefully things will smooth over like they usually do in this crazy community.
Randy Rooney