Candle and Lola Strangled!

[JohnM]

Paul,

I just wanted to say a couple things. I have no idea if you will continue to communicate with me via email as it may conflict with your new path. So, here it goes.

Paul, thanks for being part of this community for as long as you have. You produced some great stuff and you are a talented individual. We have shared in some great conversations. I hope your new path takes you in a direction that is fulfilling.

I am spiritual, however, not religious. So, by my tradition based on my beliefs, I will simply wish you the best. May your journey facilitate what you crave.

JohnM

[tommygun]

Let me reiterate the point that has been made by a number of people, Paul. You haven't led anyone down any paths. In fact, to the contrary. In my case, the path of interest in this material was started through the verbal conflict between my mother and my father when I was a very young child. The material you produced was a pleasure, but no more destructive than the occasional doughnut makes one obese. We are all adults here. We make decisions about what we do and how we spend our time and money. We make decisions about how we relate to and respect others. Nothing you've done has changed any of those decisions for any of us, I'm very sure. We've appreciated the artistry you brought to our community of interest, and we will miss it.

[cllubber]

Paul,

It was very sad learning about your decision to stop production. Whatever your reasons, all of us in this community must respect your decision and pray for resolution of any problems you may be experiencing. Thank you for sharing your talent with us and for bringing such a great example of professionalism to this unique community. Your impact has been extremely positive and you will be sorely missed.

I have always admired your work and have purchased several of your older videos, which are certain masterpieces. After losing my business a year ago and experiencing extreme financial hardship, I have not been able to buy your latest productions, which I consider your best ever. Please make them available for purchase on some kind of archive website. There must be a way to do that without it costing you too much time or money.

Your work is too awesome to sit dormant somewhere, unappreciated. If ever given a chance again, I will buy many of your videos as soon as possible. Hopefully you will seriously consider this rrequest and accept my offer to help however I practically can.

Sincerely,

Cllubber

[cllubber]

Paul,

I just read your last post. It's a good one. Sounds like you're a fellow Christian and have dealt with the same concerns I have about how I spend my time with this subject matter. God's grace is a beautiful thing. There is nothing we can do to earn it, or to make Him forsake us. That's His promise. Once we accept him as our Lord and Savior, He is always there for us, even though we don't deserve Him.

I'm a good guy, honest, hard working and very loving for all mankind, regardless of our many differences, but I just have this unexplainable taste that you and I share. It does not make us bad people, but can, like you said, affect our lives in ways we cannot really see, so we try to limit how much time we spend with this interest.

I have gone through many cycles of guilt and rationalization causing me to reform my ways an untold number of times, with countless purges of my collections over the past 13 years, only to start them all over again after the urge returns. Why? I realize the material is out there, so what difference does it make whether it's in my collection, where I can easily access it, or somewhere out in cyberspace, where I have to spend much more time and money looking for it all over again? After tiring of these cycles, I finally concluded that God loves me no matter what. I CAN have a collection of video and still images without it costing me my good name and my salvation.

All I want is to do like you're doing, move on with my life in a very postive, productive and moral way with clean thoughts and a wholesome family life. I don't want this fetish to control me, so I don't let it. Your work has value in how it allows people to move on with their lives after finding fantasy productions that provide catharsis for our unique tastes. It helped me to quit beating myself up for being the way I am, by finding a way to manage my fetish and minimize its effect on my public life. I have pretty much done that, but am saddened by the prospect of missing out on your masterful work, just because of my financial situation while your videos were available.

Forgive me for not finding a way to buy them when they were available. Guess I really could have found a way to do it, but I did not. My life is improving rapidlly now after experiencing some serious challenges over these past couple of years. What got me through it all was my faith in God and my knowledge that He loves me just like I am, just like He loves people who do much worse things than you and I could ever imagine doing.

I'm sorry for not being a bigger part of this community over the past 13 years. I'm sorry for not patronizing your business more, because the effort you put forth was definitely worth our regular support. I sincerely wish you all the best in whatever you decide to do, but please allow us to buy your videos. That's on us, not you. Like Tommygun said, we're all adults, responsible for our actions.

You have provided us a great service and brought respectability to this community. I marvel at the very articulate, respectful dialog that you and others like Bluestone, Geno, G-Man and Big-O have been able to moderate for so many years. Sure, people get sideways with each other sometimes. I never got mixed up in any of the mess, because for me it was all about being thankful that people like yourself did what you did. You gave us all something to look forward to and you helped us feel more "normal" if that's the right word.

Until I found this community, I really had a hard time with my fetish, could not figure it out and thought I was the only one in the world like me. It was such a relief to find you and so many others like me. I remember when your KHP site started and what an amazing impact your special effects made on us all. You can be very proud of your contributions and the positive role you played in so many lives.

Could you find it in your heart to make your videos available for purchase again? I'm sure there is someone who would be happy to host them and handle the money for you. Please don't let those masterpieces lay dormant.

Guess I've bent your ear enough for one night. Thanks for listening.

Best regards,

Cllubber

[Bluestone]

Cllubber,

It would be nice if Paul would answer your heartfelt missive personally, but he has said his goodbyes, and I'm pretty sure that he won't be reading, or if reading, he won't be responding. I have had many long and involved discussions with Paul on the whole subject of Christians losing their salvation, and we simply disagree on this subject. I cannot say that Paul is wrong in his interpretation of the scriptures, because I am not anywhere close to all-knowing. So, in the final analysis, everyone has to make these eternal decisions for themselves. Paul is a strong man and has made his decision. Although, I can't disagree with him making this decision for himself, I have decided to stay in this community and keep this site open for the many like us who need to know that we are not crazy or dangerous or sick for having the thoughts that we have. I do not feel guilty for producing the films that I produce. Paul, on the other hand, has taken down all of his films and even destroyed recent filmed footage after having paid hundreds of dollars to film it. He is serious. He has said that he is not coming back to this genre, and he firmly believes that by distributing his material any longer, he is contributing to a sinful addiction, like passing out alcohol to alcoholics (my analogy, not his).

So, I hear your plea, I have made it clear to Paul that once one has accepted Jesus as one's Lord and Saviour, he's not an easy God to lose He's been with me through all of my Prodigal wanderings, and He has never left me or forsaken me. I also do not view our genre as anything more than fantasy entertainment, no more sinful than watching "Murder She Wrote". Paul, on the other hand, does not agree and, in the final analysis, it's his life and his decision to make. I don't think anyone is going to change his mind. Believe me, I have tried, and he has tried to convince me to shut down this site as well as Silk Videos and join him. I have respectfully declined, and will be sticking around the Bluestone Mansion as long as there is one single person in this great wide world who has not yet discovered that there is nothing wrong with him or her and that there is an abundance of hope, faith and love, and mostly love, available for them in this welcoming and understanding community.

Blue

[Bluestone]

Since Paul has given his final farewell and has closed all of his stores, I am now locking this thread.

Blue